Fantasy or not.

“Why Do Adults Fantasize?”

Virtually everyone fantasizes about sex, whether they are male or female,
young or older, married or single, sexually frustrated or sexually happy. But
the content and nature of sexual fantasies vary tremendously. You may fantasize
about sex with a “generic” sex partner – faceless and anonymous. Just
as likely, the object of your fantasies is someone real: an attractive stranger
glimpsed on the street, a friend or acquaintance, a celebrity, a former lover or
a relative. Even your own spouse or current lover.

Some fantasies are extended sexual scenarios, filled with elaborate
details. Others are quite spare. You may, for instance, just imagine one act – a
kiss, oral sex, or intercourse – or one feeling, such as orgasm.

While fantasies can, and do, take place without the accompaniment of
sexual activity, both sexes often engage in fantasy while masturbating or during
sex with a partner. Some people vary the fantasies they have. Some have a
favorite fantasy (or two or three) that they rely on to get aroused and reach
orgasm.

Is It Okay to Fantasize?

I agree with most  therapists, engaging in sexual fantasy is a harmless
pleasure. It boosts sexual arousal and makes people feel good.  Even though
we’re not likely to ever have sex with fourteen Playboy or Playgirl models, it
can feel very good to imagine doing so. Fantasizing, and sharing sexual
fantasies, can also add excitement to a couple’s sex life. Only a very few
couples seek to fulfill their fantasy.

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